I Love You, Too
by NewYorker5152
Summary: OS for the missing scene from the last episode of the series. After Pauline tells Brian about Johnny and he walks away. How I think it should’ve ended for the two
1. Closure

This scene left me unsettled and without a season 2 in the works, I couldn't leave this hanging. So alas...here we are!

The night had replayed over in her head like a broken record of sorts. Not one that was pleasant either. She sat at the table in the kitchen. It was quiet and lonely in the house. Brian had taken off and gone god knows where. Everything came spilling out in that moment. After leaving it bottled up she couldn't hold it in any longer.

You've bloody done it again. You've messed it all up for yourself.

She wondered if she shouldn't of sprung this on him but it was eating her alive now that it was out in the open. It didn't help that Bunny, would potentially find out either and god knows where that would end up.

Instead of reaching for the ovaltine, she went right for a sherry. Yes, she thought, this will calm my nerves.

After downing the sherry, Pauline sat crying. She didn't hear anyone in the house and thought she was alone.

The box in front of her, with the baby things, was now being used as leverage for her head as she sobbed into it. All she could do was cry. The alcohol left her feeling even more depressed and upset.

" Pauline…" Brian finally said, emerging from the shadows of the dark living room. He had just come home.

Sniffling and sobbing, she couldn't bring herself to acknowledge his presence.

He placed his hand on her back and rubbed it gently. He wasn't sure what to say. He was angered and shocked by it. He had questions, but after a long walk to clear his head he didn't want to leave Pauline alone, not like this when she needed someone the most.

The words she said to him, " I did love you. I do love you." echoed in his mind as he walked. Things had been shaky for them until this bloody Ann Summers business rekindled the spark he had for her. The spark that they lost.

There was so much that needed to be said that had been shoved under the rug. They had been keeping up appearances instead of trying to iron out the flaws. Brian found escape in his work. He was passionate about his meats, leaving Pauline alone to drown her sorrows. His constant obsession with work left little time for them to work out their problems which meant they kept building walls.

He sat down beside his wife and pulled her into his arms and let her cry. He rocked them gently back and forth until the crying had ceased and she was steadily breathing.

" I think we should have a proper talk, in the morning. Let's go up to bed. Alright?" Brian proposed.

He could feel Pauline nodding her head against him when he spoke. When he stood up, he kept his arm around her and led them to their bedroom.

Pauline changed and curled in a tight little ball under the blankets and hugged onto her pillows. She didn't say anything to Brian and just shut her eyes to rest, knowing tomorrow was going to be a long one.

When Brian emerged from the bathroom, he saw Pauline's small form curled up in their big bed, making her appear much smaller than she was. He crept over to the bed and finally got in. Instead of turning opposite his wife, he instead pulled her close to him and let his chin rest atop her head, hoping she'd know that he was on her side and willing to hear her out.

" I love you, too." He whispered.


	2. Surprises

The next morning, Pauline wasn't anywhere to be found when Brian woke up. He looked around their bedroom and didn't see her.

" Pauline?" Brian called out.

Nothing.

Sighing he grabbed his robe and headed down the hall.

He could hear giggles coming from the kitchen and figured that Stanley was up and entertaining his wife as she made breakfast.

After a quick trip to the loo, Brian headed down the stairs and saw his wife playing the food.

" Good morning Stanley, how did you sleep?" He asked ruffling his hair.

" Eh, not bad." He replied.

Brian chuckled at the boy and smiled. He so enjoyed having him around.

Stanley wasn't fond of his abusive and drunk father. Since Dawn had gotten married and they had just moved above the meat shop, he quite liked his home here with Pauline and Brian and was settling quite nicely.

" Morning Pauline." Brian said, giving her a smile.

" Hi." She replied, not returning his smile. She kept his back to him and finished cooking.

" Here we are Stanley, a nice big breakfast for a growing boy like yourself." Pauline replied as she laid the plate full of food in front of him.

Stanley's eyes lit up and he grinned at her.

Her heart felt shattered. I'll never be anyone's mother.

Pauline's eyes began to water. She quickly placed Brian's breakfast in front of him and excused herself and hurried up to their bedroom so Brian wouldn't see her crying again.

Her mind was on Jonathan. She hoped he was alright. She grabbed her pillow and sat on the bed and cried right into it.

" No one said you had to hold it together alone." Brian said as he took a seat beside his wife, sliding an arm around her.

" I don't want to give him up. Eventually we're going to have to." Pauline sniffled.

" No we aren't. He's going to be ours Pauline. Ours to love and raise. I'll mold him the way my father molded me." Brian chuckled.

Pauline managed a little laugh and wiped her eyes.

" You should eat before your breakfast gets cold." She whispered. At the moment, Pauline couldn't find her voice.

Brian reached out and took her hand.

" I want to talk to you. I don't want to keep sweeping things under the rug. I put the tv on so I'm sure Stanley won't burn the house down." He said, laughing a little.

With a shaky breath, she nodded, unsure of where to start.

Brian sensed her distress and made it easy. He whispered in her ear he loved her and could feel his wife relaxing under his words.

Keeping his arm around her, he pulled her a little tighter to him.

" Maybe we can have a second chance. To do it right. I'd like to adopt little Stanley." Brian spoke up.

Pauline gasped in shock. " A-a-are you certain?"

Brian put his hand up and nodded, signaling for her to calm down.

" Only If you think we can do this." He coyly looked at her.

" Oh Brian." Pauline smiled at her husband of 30 years. She cupped his cheek in her hand and kissed him.

He wanted to talk with her about Jonathan but the time wasn't right for that. He wanted to wait until they were alone.

The smell of breakfast wafted up to the room and Brian saw Pauline scrunching her face. He was about to suggested they go down to join little Stanley but his wife's demeanor had changed. Her face had turned pale and she had shoved him out of the way, running right for their bathroom.

" Pauline?" Brian shook his head, wondering what had gotten into her.

He got up and saw her on the floor crouched by the toilet. Worry filled his body. He held her hair and tried to comfort her as she puked.

With his back to the door, Brian was unaware Stanley had been watching. He had come up to ask if Pauline would make him more bacon, but clearly he saw she wasn't able too at the moment.

" Me da used to do that after he got drunk." Stanley quipped as he looked on.

His presence startled both Pauline and Brian.

" Shut the door. She isn't drunk. She's sick, lad! Now run downstairs. Give us some privacy!" Brian ordered.

Little Stanley nodded and dashed away.

Once Pauline had finished retching, Brian helped her to stand when she found her bearings.

" Come lay down love." He said once she rinsed her mouth out.

Pauline nodded and found her way to the bed. Brian eased her in and covered her up.

" I'll get Dawn to come get Stanley. We'll go see the doctor." He kissed her head.

Pauline sighed and shut her eyes to rest. She couldn't argue there. She had been feeling terrible the past few days. She hoped it was nothing.

Brain made some phone calls and had Dawn come to collect Stanley for the afternoon before he went up to help Pauline so they could get to the doctor. Pauline was pale and didn't look so good as he got them out to the car.

" I hope you aren't dying." Brian worried.

Pauline swatted his arm.

" I'm not dying." She rolled her eyes.

…………………………..

Waiting seemed to be the worst part of all. Pauline feared the worst. What if it was cancer? No it can't be.

Pauline had been busy with parties and with the recent stress of the wedding and Brian's accident she hadn't really had time to rest or relax; throw Jonathan's appearance into the mix, it had left her unsettled. In the back of her mind she just knew it had to have been something horrible that was wrong with her.

She hadn't been feeling well the past few weeks but the nausea had really gotten her good this morning. She wasn't sure what it was. It had been out of nowhere. One minute she was starved and cooking breakfast and the next, she could barely manage the smells of the bacon.

The doctor had taken blood tests, urine tests, and everything under the sun and now she was in a room, laying on the bed hoping the doctor would come in and just tell them they could go and it was simply exhaustion or stress.

" Mrs. Spake, we've just received all your results." The doctor said, making his way into the room nearly an hour later. He strolled in very casually, not understanding that the waiting had stressed his patient.

" About bloody time." Brian muttered.

The doctor cleared his throat, not appreciating the additional comments.

" Is she ill, or dying?" Brian asked.

Pauline rolled her eyes, clearly frustrated. The doctor gave her a sympathetic look and chuckled.

" Well it's not an illness persay, however, it's rather uncommon but not impossible."

" If I'm not ill than what's wrong with me? I certainly haven't felt well." Pauline raised her voice.

" You're pregnant." He said.

That was the last thing Pauline heard before she fainted.

Brian nearly shot out of his seat. He couldn't believe it.

" You're joking!" He spat as he tended to his wife.

" I'm afraid I'm not. While her age does put her at risk, it doesn't mean that it can't be done. She'll deliver fine. According to my charts, Mrs. Spake is a very healthy woman."

Brian wasn't sure whether to be happy or sad or what. It was all very shocking. He knew Pauline had been surprised by the news as well.

" Are you certain? Pauline Spake is...is pregnant?" Brian managed.

" Very certain. The tests conclude it."

" Since you're here now, I'd like to take a look and do an ultrasound so we can gauge how far along she is and give you a chance to think about things and weigh your options."

Brian didn't know what to do yet but nod. He was still speechless.

Pauline had come too and was trying to take everything in stride. They had received the shock of their lives.

The doctor left the room to get what he needed and left them alone.

Brian paced and looked at his wife. " Pauline. A-are you alright, love?"

" S-stunned would be more like it. Oh Brian." Pauline teared up and looked across the room at her husband. She was expecting him to walk right out the door yet again. After all this was yet another big bombshell dropped on him for a second time that week and she wasn't sure he could handle this...or herself for that matter.

Brian took a few steps over towards the table and grabbed Pauline's hand in his.

" Those bloody Ann Summers parties got us here, but I wouldn't have it any other way." He replied as he pulled her in for a deep and passionate kiss.

Pauline was definitely taken aback by his reaction towards the situation and could only react by kissing him deeply, pulling away for air after a few moments.

Before more could be said, there was a knock at the door. A friendly looking nurse entered with a machine and a gown. Brian took that as his cue to wait in the hall. He stood as people walked passed him, lost in thought.

She's going to have my baby. Our baby. Somebody's mother. Somebody's father.

" You can come back in now Mr. Spake." the friendly nurse brought him back to reality.

" Hmm? Alright." he replied with a nod.

The lights were off and Pauline was now laying down on the table. Brian took a seat by her side, careful not to sit on and wrinkle her dress and coat that were laid across the back of the chair.

Pauline winced and squeezed Brian's hand as the nurse put the cold gel across her stomach.

" Sorry bout that! It's not pleasant the first few times but it will get better. Now let's have a look at the little one." the nurse apologized and tried to lighten the mood, sensing her patient was tense and nervous.

Pauline only nodded. Her eyes were carefully glued to the screen, wondering what was going to appear.

After a few minutes, the friendly nurse looked at Pauline. She was teary eyed as she stared at the small bean looking figure that appeared on the screen. She knew.

" It seems you're at around 10 weeks. It's small now, but he or she will grow. I promise."

The older couple was still in shock, she figured. They weren't speaking up and she knew it probably didn't seem real to them.

" Don't be worried. As long as you follow what the doctor tells you and rest as much as possible, the baby will be just fine. Me mum and dad were older when they had me. Scared out of their minds they were, but they did it. You seem like you'll be a good mum and dad." Amanda reassured them.

Pauline gave her a smile.

The doctor came in to check everything over and made her an appointment with her OB/GYN and gave her some prenatal vitamins to begin taking.

" Congratulations." he said to the two before heading out of the room.

Brian helped his wife off the table and they headed out back to the car. She wasn't feeling so sick anymore. It was quickly replaced by a feeling of hunger.

" I hope we haven't kept Dawn tied up with little Stanley." Pauline worried about the little boy.

" I asked her to keep him for the day. We'll get him tomorrow. I wanted the evening to take you to dinner and talk." Brian replied as he drove them to one of their favorite restaurants.

As Brian drove, Pauline kept a hand tightly clasped over her abdomen. Although she was beginning to fill out, she didn't have a bump yet. She smiled at the thought of a baby and everything that went along with pregnancy. She didn't get to enjoy and relish her first pregnancy at a young age, she was surely going to take advantage of it now.

Brian's lips brushing her cheek drew Pauline from her thoughts. She had been deep in thought and hadn't realized they had finally made it to the restaurant.

After ordering, Pauline and Brian were free to talk. They were sitting at a table that was free and clear from everyone so that way they had a chance to chat without worrying about anyone hearing their conversation.

" Do you want to keep this baby?" Brian asked, as he sipped his tea.

Pauline inhaled. " Of course. What kind of-" then she realized what he was getting at, Jonathan.

Pauline only replied with a nod.

" If you want me to. I love you Brian."

" I love you too, Pauline." he replied, grabbing her hand gently in his own.

" So- Jonathan's father...where is he?" Brian asked, keeping her hand in his.

" I'm not sure. I really don't know." Pauline honestly answered that. She did love him, but she let him go and wasn't quite sure where he went. She hoped she could be of some help to her son in order to find him, but didn't want to tell Brian because he still seemed shocked by the whole idea.

Their food came and Pauline was glad for the distraction. The two ate in silence and finished off their meals.

TBC...


	3. Secrets

Things started to get busy as everyone had quite a lot going on. Steph was rallying up the girls for a new product launch and was excited to show them everything that was coming out.

It had been about a month and a half since they had all really seen each other, but the Ann Summers parties still continued.

Pauline was anxious as she stood in the mirror that evening. She was feeling a little self conscious and nervous. She was assessing her outfit and decided it would be best to slip on her favorite pink coat so she didn't have to think about her growing belly and answer to anyone just yet. She rubbed her hands across her abdomen and smiled. She was now 16 weeks and her belly was starting to show more. It was beginning to become more real that they were having a baby. Their own little baby.

She and Brian still managed to keep the secret just between the two of them and tried to not let on anything was going on. They hadn't told little Stanley yet, because they wanted to keep things private until she was a bit further along.

As Pauline stood in the mirror lost in thought, she fell into a trance staring at her stomach.

" Hi little one." Pauline said softly, her voice only just above a whisper,

She didn't realize Brian was standing and watching her. He found her so captivating even more now. Their child growing and now Pauline; he was smitten.She was gorgeous with her growing figure. He slowly came into the room and quietly made his way behind her and wrapped his arms around her.

" Absolutely beautiful my love." Brian smiled as he kissed her neck.

Pauline shut her eyes and leaned back on her husband, savoring his touches and kisses.

He laid his hands carefully on top of her stomach and smiled. They stared at their reflection in the mirror.

" Who would've thought it; us together like this. You're breathtaking and enchanting Pauline." He murmured.

Pauline blushed. He thinks I'm enchanting and beautiful.

She turned and pulled Brian's face in close and kissed him deeply until she heard a horn honking outside. it was Dawn.

" You best be good. Don't let Stanley stay up too late, alright? He's a growing boy and needs his sleep." Pauline winked.

" I won't. I had plans to watch a movie with the lad and then I'm sending him to bed." Brian chuckled.

" That's a good father." she said, smiling up at him.

Pauline kissed Brian again and headed down the stairs. She ruffled Stanley's hair and bid him goodnight and left.

Dawn smiled as Pauline sat down in the car.

" Sorry I'm late. I couldn't find a thing to wear." Pauline apologized.

" Not to worry. We've got plenty to try at the party." Dawn winked over at her newfound friend.

Pauline giggled. She knew they'd spend the evening trying things out and trying things on.

As they set off on the drive, Dawn was talking about married life and asking about Stanley.

" Dawn- I was just thinking. Tonight. They'll have food tonight, right? Should we stop and get something?"

" Relax. Of course we'll have food. We always do." Dawn thought that was odd. She'd never really seen Pauline eat much at the parties. The thing she usually went for was the booze. She chuckled at the thought and cranked up the music and they rode to Steph's.

When they arrived, Pauline was feeling a little queasy. She was hoping maybe eating something would do the trick.

She took her time walking inside, Dawn had already gone on ahead. They were holding the party at the basement of a small restaurant and their small original group was all in attendance.

Pauline's tired eyes lit up as she spotted a table full of food beside the one featuring all the new products and made a bee-line for it.

" Woah. Someone clearly couldn't wait to try out the new vibrators." Steph laughed as she watched Pauline cross the room.

" She's headed for the snacks not the bloody merchandise." Dawn giggled, noting that her friend had parked herself right in front of the table assessing the food.

She grabbed a plate full of food and munched away as she looked at the table beside it covered with the newest collection of items to sell. If you told Pauline Spake a year ago she'd be shilling or attending a party selling sex aids and sexy lingerie she would've laughed or possibly fainted. But here she was. A black silk number caught her eye. She figured Brian wouldn't mind seeing her in that. It was much shorter than the pink and black one he saw her in the first time that took his breath away.

She blushed thinking about that night. The night that little baby Spake was conceived. She giggled at the thought.

" Everything alright Mrs. S?" Dawn asked as she joined Pauline at the table.

" Perfectly fine. Just thinking about something funny that happened with Stanley. He and Brian are getting along quite well, surprisingly. I'm glad you brought him to stay with us. You know, Dawn...I wanted to talk with you about maybe-" Pauline was interrupted by Steph yelling at the women to quiet down.

Pauline wanted to ask Dawn about adopting the little boy. She wasn't sure what she would say but she and Brian knew they wanted this, they wanted to take him in. After all, Pauline knew he'd be a great big brother. They loved little Stanley like their own. He kept them young and kept them on their toes. She has fallen in love with the little boy, frogs and all.

She and Dawn took a seat by Nita.

" As you know, the demand for Ann has proven to be quite successful and now that I've become area manager, I thought about giving all of you a sneak preview at what's to come. I didn't want to invite the lot, besides I thought it would be like the early days." Steph said, smiling warmly at the other 3 women.

Her eyes couldn't quite meet Pauline's and she knew they would need to talk soon. Alone. Grabbing the newest merchandise, she passed it around explaining what it was.

" Bloody hell. It just keeps getting better." Dawn laughed as she held up a skimpy little leopard and lace nightie.

" I think I like this one." Nita smirked, holding up a deep red one that had holes where your boobs should go.

Wrapped up on her chest was her newest little boy. He was asleep and Pauline had been staring at the little thing she helped deliver. He reminded her of Jonathan as a baby. She wanted so badly to hold him in her arms again. My poor baby boy. Oh Jonathan. I hope he knows I love him now and I will make a go at it, whether Brian agrees with me or not.

" Pauline? What do you think?" Steph asked, noting the paled and far off expression on Pauline's face.

Shaking her from her thoughts, Pauline felt Dawn's arm on her wrist.

" You alright Mrs. S?" she asked again.

Before Pauline could reply, she felt it coming up. Oh no.

Shoving Dawn's hand away, Pauline made a run for the bathroom. Clearly the baby wasn't too thrilled with what she had eaten.

Steph was really worried. " Keep checking out the products. I'll be back." She told the others.

Heading towards the bathroom, she heard sniffling and Pauline's muffled voice as she stuck her ear to the door. She could hear her gagging that's for sure but the fan in the bathroom was making it hard to hear. She pushed open the door quietly and found her in the last stall and saw her knees on the floor.

" Mummy is sorry. She won't eat finger sandwiches again little one." Pauline said.

Steph raised a brow.

What on earth is she talking about? Is she drunk?

Emerging from the stall, Pauline was startled by Steph's appearance and jumped back.

" OHH! Steph, w-what are you doing in here?" Pauline asked. Her eyes were wide and she wondered just how much she'd heard.

" I-I was coming to check on you. You don't look well at all." Steph noted as Pauline stepped up to the sink and washed her hands.

It was quiet for a few moments until Pauline dried her hands and rinsed her mouth out. shuffling passed Steph. " It's nothing. I'm alright." Pauline was about to open the door when Steph grabbed her arm, spinning Pauline around gently to face her so she could speak to her.

" He wants to see you, Johnny that is." Steph said, with half a smile, wondering if all this poor woman's stress and paleness was caused by worry over Johnny.

Pauline's eyes twinkled a bit. " He does?"

Steph nodded. " We'd like to have you over for dinner. He's happy. He's moved in with me, you know. The whole reason he came back to this town was to find you, and he wants you apart of hi- apart of our lives more, if you want to be."

Pauline nodded and took Steph's hands in her own and squeezed them gently. She was glad to see Steph and Johnny both so happy. After years of heartache, her son needed the chance to be happy and have his chance.

" We best get back. We don't want to miss all the fun, do we?" Pauline giggled.

" No, I guess not." Steph replied with a smile.

The two women joined in. Nita was now feeding her baby boy and Dawn was busy rummaging through the pile of new nighties to find one suitable for Russell.

After some laughter and talking, the room fell quiet for a few moments. Pauline decided to clear her throat.

" I think- I need to tell you all something, before Brian's big mouth shouts it to the world." Pauline said.

" What is it?" Nita asked.

6 pairs of eyes were on her now. Taking a deep breath, Pauline's eyes darted around the room before she spoke up. She kept her focus on the nursing baby under his blankets.

" Brian and I...well...we." Pauline wasn't quite sure how to say it.

" Please don't say you and Mister S are getting divorce!" Dawn worried.

She hoped they weren't. She loved them like they were her surrogate parents and she not only loved them but she trusted them with little Stanley. Her brother was in good hands with those two.

" No, no. It's nothing like that." Pauline eased her mind and patted her shoulder.

" I guess I should just show you." She said. Pauline stood and removed her coat.

The other 3 women were wondering what that had to do with anything. Once she took it off, Pauline wondered if they would notice her stomach.

" I'm- I'm pregnant." Pauline said as she laid a hand on top of the little bump she had.

" Right...good one Pauline." Steph laughed.

Looking over at Pauline and then her midsection, she realized it wasn't a joke. They went quiet.

The three women gasped in complete and utter shock. Dawn fainted right to the ground while Nita and Steph looked at her, much like Brian did the night she threw off her coat in a rage.

" Dawn!" Pauline worried.

" I-I think she's as shocked as we are." Nita said.

" I reacted the same way." Pauline stifled a laugh as she tried to wake Dawn.

Steph didn't know what to say, or think. She felt very protective of Johnny and wasn't sure he would take to this news very well-considering what he went through.

As Dawn was coming too, Steph stood back.

" Well...I think we can call that the end of this night. We've all had a bit of a shock." Steph said quickly hurrying to the table to pack her things.

Pauline could sense her frustration and anger but she was tending to Dawn at the moment and she didn't know what to say to her. She hoped she wouldn't tell Johnny just yet.

Pauline left Dawn's side for a moment and eased herself up and over to Steph as she stood cleaning up from the party.

" Let me help. Please." Pauline said, grabbing the silk from Steph's hands, only to have her snatch it back.

" I think you've done enough this evening. Why don't you just go and forget the dinner invitation! How well do you think Johnny is going to react to this bloody shocking news? I don't think he's going to take to it very well!" She snapped.

Pauline stood back, leveraging herself with a hand on the table.

" My intent wasn't too hurt him, or your relationship with this news. It was completely unexpected and couldn't have happened at a crazier moment. Don't you think I don't realize that?! I'm too old for this to be happening but it is and I can't change it. I want this child, like I wanted Johnny! The circumstances were different then. I talked to him and he knows I'm going to do my best to prove I want him to be happy and I'll do what I can to support him! And you! I- ohhhhhhhhh" Pauline's face scrunched and contorted in pain as she felt a horrible pain go through her abdomen.

Steph grabbed for Pauline's arms.

" Pauline? What's going on?" She worried.

Pauline squeezed her arm and moaned.

" NITA! DAWN! A little help here!" Steph called.

Dawn had come too and was sipping water in the chair. Nita laid her sleeping baby boy in his car seat and hurried over with Dawn to the table.

" I'll call the ambulance! And Brian!" Dawn hurried to the phone.

Nita was rubbing Pauline's back. She hoped the poor woman would be alright.

" Can you sit?" Steph asked, keeping her grip tight against Pauline.

" I don't think I can move." Pauline mumbled. Her breathing was labored and she was trying to relax as she rubbed her belly.

In and out. Slowly old girl. This baby is not coming yet.

" They are on the way." Dawn hurried back over. She was still so shocked by the news and hoped that her reaction hadn't caused the problem.

Steph held Pauline up and didn't move her, hoping that everything would be alright.

They heard the ambulance and Nita went to go get them to show them where they were.

Dawn sighed in relief as she heard Brian's voice as he came down the stairs with Nita and the medics following closely behind.

" That's my wife. Right there. With the blue dress on." Brian told the medics.

He stood out of the way to let them get to her and looked at Dawn. She quickly came to his side.

" What the hell happened?" He worried.

Dawn shrugged. " I- I'm not sure. But congrats Mr. S. You'll be a good father."

Brian smiled a moment at Dawn.

" Oh- Stanley! Stanley is asleep at the house! Blood hell, I forgot the lad!" Brian noticed.

" Don't worry. I'll head over and keep an eye on things. Just go with Pauline." She said.

Brain nodded and hurried over to where Pauline was. She was on the stretcher and she was crying.

He hurried to her and grabbed her hand in his.

" Don't worry. We won't lose it now. It'll be fine, Pauline." Brian said, squeezing her hand gently.

Pauline nodded her head and wiped her eyes as the tears kept flowing.

…………………………………..

Pauline's eyes fluttered open as she felt something being stuck inside her mouth

. It was dark and cold in the room except for light seeping from under the door. The curtains were drawn to not let light in but she could tell that it was morning.

Looking around she saw Brian asleep beside her in a chair, snoring softly and a nurse standing over her. Why is there a nurse here what is-

Then it it her

The BABY!

Worriedly, a hand flew to her belly.

The nurse sensed her stress and quickly calmed her.

" The baby is fine Mrs. Spake. You're still pregnant." She smiled softly at the woman after removing the thermometer from her mouth.

" What happened? Last night- I had this horrible pain!" Pauline worried.

" It was your body telling you that stress isn't good. You need to keep calm, for your baby. Your blood pressure was extremely high last night. It's gone down considerably now and it's fine. The doctor will come in later this afternoon. He wants you here for tests today and to rest. But don't worry everything checks out just fine and your baby is still growing. Care for some breakfast?" She asked.

Pauline was quite overwhelmed and shocked but managed a nod.

" Good. I'll call down and have them make you a tray and bring your husband one as well." She smiled and tucked Pauline back under the blankets.

Once she left the room, Pauline started to cry which woke Brian.

" Pauline? What's wrong? What is it? Shall I ring for the nurse?" He worriedly sat up. The quiet conversation before hadn't passed him, but her crying did.

" No. Nothing's wrong. I'm just...the baby made it. It'll be fine." Pauline said, gripping Brian's hand in her own.

He gently wiped her tears and kissed her head.

" The doctor said he'd like to run some tests while we are here but everything is going to be fine. He's sure of it. It was just a scare. Baby Spake will be just fine, Pauline."

Brian moved from his chair to the hospital bed and sat on the edge, allowing Pauline to curl up in his arms. She laid her head on his chest and they both hand a hand on her belly.

" Everything is going to be alright. I won't let anything happen to my two loves." Brian reassured her.

Brian planted kisses all down the side of her neck, smiling gently at his wife. He felt her instantly relax in his arms and they both dozed off into a light sleep until their breakfast came. The two ate and tore into the food. Brian sipped his coffee. Clearly the food wasn't up to his standards. He hoped Pauline was eating enough.


	4. It’s a ?

Nearly 2 months had passed and Pauline was at home and out of the hospital. She had been taking things slow trying to keep herself stress free and keep the baby growing. It was doctor's orders and she was trying to follow them to a T.

With Brian at work and Stanley in school all day, it left Pauline the chance to begin work on the nursery. Pauline was now a few weeks into her 6th month of pregnancy and enjoying feeling her little one moving about. Her sickness had thankfully gone away but her appetite was increasing as well as her waist line.

Luckily for her, Dawn had the day off and was coming to take her to the store to pick out some things after her appointment. But first, they had to go check on the baby.

Dawn was chatting her ear off on the drive as Pauline sipped her tea that was in her thermos.

" You're looking quite large Mrs. S! Do you think the baby is a boy?" Dawn asked innocently.

Rolling her eyes, Pauline couldn't help but laugh. She had gotten significantly larger over the past month.

" I'm not quite sure. Brian thinks it's going to be a girl. I hope it is. I'd love a baby girl." Pauline said, rubbing her stomach gently, getting a few kicks from the little one inside.

" Stanley already has one sister so I'm sure he wouldn't mind another." Dawn laughed, making Pauline do the same.

He was so excited about the new baby and couldn't wait to be a big brother. He was so protective of Pauline whenever they were out of the house, shopping without Brian. He made sure to stay close. The little boy loved Pauline and Brian dearly and had taken to them as mom and dad.

While they were out running errands, Brian and Stanley were back at the house decorating with the others for the baby shower he was planning. Steph, and Nita were helping out as

" Do we really need all these decorations, Da?" Stanley asked Brian as he placed decorations all over the living room.

" Well, if men had their way, I'd have beer and pub food. Women need all the fancy things." He chuckled as he shoved a handful of crisps in his mouth, earning an eye roll and glare from the two women.

" You men…" Nita rolled her eyes.

They were busy setting everything out and putting all the gifts on the table. Brian didn't realize how much a baby needed. Stanley was easy to buy for but as he looked at all the gifts on the table, he was a bit overwhelmed.

" Brian, are you alright?" Steph asked.

" No. Honestly. Pauline's about to have a baby in a few months and what bloody good will I be as a father?" Brian asked, feeling a little nervous and defeated. Seeing all the baby items made it all the more real. In a little under 3 months, baby Spake would be making his or her appearance.

" You'll be a wonderful father, Brian. You and Pauline already take such great care of Stanley. Being a parent will easy. I promise. We are all here to help you both. Nita's the real expert though, she has 5 children." Steph teased causing Brian to chuckle and forget his worry.

She had a point. They weren't alone. They had friends to help. Brian sighed in relief and nodded. " You're right."

" I'm always right, Brian." She chuckled.

Meanwhile at the doctor's office, Pauline had gone back for her ultrasound with Dawn. Dawn sat across from Pauline in a chair and made sure she wasn't anywhere near her lower half. She already told Pauline she didn't want to see anything below the waist.

Pauline's doctor was running a little behind so the waiting wasn't fun. She was cold with only a sheet draped over her waist and her belly exposed.

" Hello Mrs. Spake, I am so sorry I'm running behind. I see you're ready for our exam and ultrasound today. Who have you brought with you?" Dr. Jan asked.

" This is my- this is Dawn. She's like my surrogate daughter." Pauline replied, smiling fondly at Dawn.

" Pleasure to meet you Dawn. It's great you're here supporting Pauline and Brian." She said.

Dawn nodded. " They've done plenty for me so it's the least I could do."

Pauline felt herself becoming emotional and stared up at the ceiling, blinking back her tears.

The doctor began her initial exam below the sheet, making sure things felt normal below. She was pleased with things. " Everything is looking great down here. Let's check on baby now. I'm sure you're eager to see the little one." She said.

Pauline nodded.

The doctor began the ultrasound and was quiet as she looked everything over. She nodded and made some notes and then turned the monitor towards Pauline and Dawn. They caught a glimpse of the baby.

" Baby Spake is looking alright. I think we should have you eat more when you feel up to it. 3 solid meals a day; have Brian indulge you in whatever you want and eat plenty of it. By our next appointment in 3 weeks, I'd like for you to gain a few more pounds. I can clearly see the sex of this baby, would you like to know?" She asked.

Pauline was surprised. She didn't think she'd want to know and have it be a surprise, but since her doctor offered her the chance, Pauline agreed. Dawn looked over at Pauline wondering if she wanted her to overhear this news or keep this moment private.

" Want me to leave?" Dawn asked.

" Oh...I forgot you were here. Dawn, I'd love for you to know but only if you'd like. I plan on telling Brian of course and little Stanley." Pauline smiled. Dawn returned her grin and sat waiting for the doctor to give away the news.

" It seems Mrs. Spake that without a doubt you're having a little girl." she said towards the older woman.

Pauline teared up. She was shocked. I get a daughter? A little girl? Brian is going to be thrilled.

" You have some work to do. The biggest thing is making sure she is growing. I'd like to keep an eye on that, but everything else looks great. Her heart and lungs are right on track so no need to worry there. You're older, and it's not uncommon for mothers your age to deliver early or have smaller babies. I just want to make sure incase she comes early, she weighs a little more. If she comes around 34-36 weeks I have no doubt she will be fine. Any earlier and we may have some trouble. I see no signs of early labor or anything to worry us. Just be careful." The doctor warned her.

Pauline nodded. She planned on eating everything she could get her hands on when she got home. She prayed this baby would be fine and she'd make it full term with her little one. There were many obstacles standing in her way but she was determined to have her daughter safely in her arms in just a few months.

Dawn felt worried for Pauline and hoped that everything would go alright for she and Brain. She hoped Stanley was behaving himself.

After they left the appointment, Pauline was famished and found herself too exhausted to shop. She and Dawn decided to head back to the house, where she was unaware a baby shower was taking place at the house.

Upon arrival, Pauline was glad to see home. She was eager to get some food and laid down for a nap. The appointment had worn her out.

Inside, Stanley had been keeping watch and saw the car pull up signaling for everyone to hide.

" I see them! I see them! Hide!" he yelled.

Everyone hid behind furniture and in the kitchen. They heard the door open and Dawn start speaking. " Why don't you go sit down and I'll tell Brian to fix you some tea." she said a little loudly, signaling Pauline was getting ready to walk through.

" THat sounds great. Thank you dear." Pauline smiled, kicking her heels off by the front door. She made her way into the living room and was stopped short by everyone yelling.

" SURPRISE!"

" OH! Oh my goodness! Brian?! Dawn! What's all this?" Pauline asked.

" A baby shower darling." Brian smiled as he made his way over to his shocked wife, hoping she was happy and not angry with him.

" Oh Brian, you wonderful man. Thank you. Thank you all." Pauline smiled around the room.

Steph, Nita, her daughter and baby and husband were there as well as Russell, Stanley, and Johnny. Pauline was surprised to see him. But glad he had decided to come.

The past few months they had spent rebuilding a relationship and Brian was beginning to get to know Johnny and rather than remain angry on the subject, he decided to make things easier and be cordial and polite to him. He wasn't welcoming to Johnny at first, but slowly he had come around. Pauline was reduced to tears at the site of her family and friends standing around. She was overcome with emotion and wiped her eyes as tears started to fall.

Brian pulled her close and laughed.

" Oh dear. She's upset!" Nita's husband said.

" No she's not, moron. She's emotional. She's happy." Nita elbowed him in his side causing Pauline to laugh.

Steph hugged Pauline and led her to the couch to sit down as Brian fixed her a plate of food.

" Oh Steph- how can I ever thank you?" Pauline asked, grabbing her hand before she walked to join the others as they were helping themselves to the food.

" You don't have too. We love you, Pauline." she smiled. They had reconciled as well and Pauline was glad for it. She loved Steph, after all,the woman was dating her son and things were getting quite serious between the two. She was very happy for them because they were both deeply in love.

Long after the party had ended and everyone had gone home and little Stanley was tucked into bed asleep, Pauline and Brian laid in bed together admiring the little baby clothes they'd received. It had been a wonderful party and their nursery was now beginning to fill up. She had yet to tell Brian about the sex of the baby and was glad to do it in private. She wanted to savor that moment and his reaction to the news.

" She's kicking!" Pauline smiled, immediately pulling Brian's hand to her stomach. She heard him gasp in shock.

" Pauline- she? You- you mean? She's a girl?" he was surprised. Pauline giggled at his reaction. His mouth was hanging open like a trout but he looked at her with love.

" Oh my darling. Pauline, you're the most wonderful woman. I love you so much. We are having a little girl! I get a daughter!" He was beaming. Brian was overjoyed with the news and couldn't wait to have a daughter.

" Which means we need to think of names since I was only thinking of names for a little boy." Pauline said.

" I have the most perfect name for our little girl, Victoria Jane Spake." Brian replied. It slipped easily off his tongue. He had been hopeful he'd be having a daughter the whole time since Pauline first found out and planned on naming his daughter after his beloved grandmother Victoria and it fit perfectly with Pauline's middle name, Jane.

Reaching over, he pulled Pauline close and wrapped both of his arms around her, letting them rest around her belly. " Hello Victoria, it's your father. I hope you like your name. I think it's beautiful." he said, pressing his lips into Pauline's neck as he spoke.

He felt a sharp kick to his hand and grinned. " She's happy." he chuckled.

" Oh Brian, that name is beautiful." Pauline whispered softly into Brian's neck.

" Like you my darling. I love you Pauline Spake." Brian kissed her deeply and laid her down into the pillows and turned off the lights.

TBC.


	5. Victoria

Pauline stood in the nursery, admiring all the work that had been done. She felt triumphed at all the work that had been put into it. They had made some progress, and there was still work to be done.

Brian and Stanley had done a splendid job of painting the room. The little lad loved to be around Brian and was his shadow. She chuckled at the thought.

_He's a wonderful little boy. _

On weekends, Stanley liked to accompany Brian to the butcher shop and apprentice. Brian let him work the register while he and Russell did the dirty work.

He enjoyed feeling like he had a family and as though he was apart of something.

Winter was fast approaching and the snow was falling quite heavily in Sheffield. It was nearly dinner time and Pauline was hoping Brian and Stanley would make it for dinner since Steph and Johnny had shown up for the evening along with Dawn.

" Pauline, I think you need to sit down. Clearly you've made the table up and cooked all the food. Take a seat and relax. I'm sure Brian and Stanley will be along soon." Steph said as she marched Pauline to the couch.

" I'm perfectly fine. I need to keep busy. I feel better when I'm moving about. My back's hurting." Pauline grimaced as she rubbed a tender part of her back.

Dawn looked to Steph as Pauline headed back for the kitchen.

" Could she be in labor?" Dawn worried.

" I don't think so. She's got a few weeks left to go. I think the baby has gotten quite heavy and her back can't take the strain. At least that's what the doctor said when I went to her last appointment." Steph reassured Dawn.

Pauline was finishing up the food and heard the front door open with a thud as it hit the wall.

" Bloody wind. It's a hell of a storm coming. Weatherman said it may be 4 feet deep." Brian told the group as he came inside, with little Stanley running in front to greet his sister and Pauline.

Russell shut the door behind them, thankful to be out of the cold air. Just as he was removing his shoes the power flickered.

" Damn." Brian groaned.

" Maybe it would be best to go home for the night, and not get stuck here." Johnny suggested.

" No, no. Better stay. We have room. Besides, you can't let a dinner this good goto waste." Brian said as he smiled at Johnny.

" Well thanks. We appreciate it." Johnny smiled and nodded towards Brian.

Stanley was in the kitchen helping Pauline carry things out to the table. As he came back in to get something else, he saw Pauline gripping tightly to the counter.

He could tell she was in pain based on the slight moan that escaped her lips and he was worried.

" You alright?" Stanley worried.

Pauline exhaled and opened her eyes that had been shut tightly and smiled down at Stanley, trying to reassure him she was fine.

" I'm fine. Now let's get this food out and eat." She replied, hoping the boy would believe her.

Pauline was in fact not alright. As soon as Stanley left with the napkins towards the table, Pauline grabbed for the counter and swayed side to side and took deep breaths, trying to ride out the small twinges she'd been feeling since that morning. They had become quite a bit stronger that night.

Her parenting book and the doctor said not to worry over it. It meant nothing. She tried her best to relax but in the back of her mind she knew that this could be it. They could have baby girl Spake a lot sooner than they anticipated.

_It's not time yet, little one. You still have 3 more weeks._ Mummy will get off her feet as soon as possible.

Once the pain finally subsided, Pauline made her way back to the table where her friends and family were happily filling their plates with food. She sat down and tried to smile at Brian.

Brian took note of his wife's pale face and hoped she hadn't gone to too much trouble by cooking for everyone.

She sat down and chatted and made normal conversation so he figured everything was fine.

As they ate, they were unaware of the snowstorm happening outside until nearly completely finished with dinner and onto dessert. The power flickered a few times when the wind picked up and then went out completely.

" Bloody freaking great." Brain sighed, slamming a hand on the table.

" I don't like the dark." Stanley whispered quietly to Pauline who in turn grabbed the boy and pulled him close.

" We can use some candles. I have a lighter." Johnny said.

" Quick thinking. I'll handle that if you can light the fire Russell." Brian said.

" Yes sir. Right away. Dawn- help me?" Russell asked.

" Men." Dawn rolled her eyes laughing. She did find it adorable that her husband was needy. Steph giggled at the response from Dawn.

" Here Stanley, come help Russell." Dawn said pulling the boy across the room.

It was now just Steph and Pauline at the table. It was dark but it was manageable to still see from the little bit of light seeping in from the outside.

Pauline got up to help retrieve some candles. " Let me. You've done enough Pauline." Steph said.

" I've got it. I promise." Pauline retorted and rolled her eyes. She didn't like being treated as an invalid especially in her own home. She was pregnant, not cripple!

Pauline made her way across the house and found the little hall closet she kept bins of supplies in. She couldn't see very well in the dark but knew they were on the bottom shelf. As she reached down, she felt another twinge pain and this time it was accompanied by warm liquid going down her legs.

Her eyes went wide.

_Oh no. Oh my god. Not here. Anywhere but here._

Her waters had broken. She wasn't about to tell Brian.

Not now anyways. She felt a pressure and bit down on her hand to keep from screaming and this one felt different than the others. Things were beginning to feel different. She felt her breathing become unsteady so she tried to relax herself and act as if she was fine.

She grabbed for the candles and hurried back across the house to find a fire lit and candles burning.

" Well. I see we have enough light on the subject to finish our meal." Pauline said, in a strained voice. Steph could tell by her stance and her walk which had turned slightly into a waddle like a penguin that Pauline was not okay.

" I agree!" Brian chuckled as he sat down to eat his seconds.

Pauline slowly took her time walking over. After she lit the candles she sat down but remained very uncomfortable so she shifted around a little.

" What's the matter Pauline? Everything alright?" Steph asked quietly. Steph was the only one that seemed to notice besides Dawn.

" I'm fine." Pauline whispered shortly towards Steph. She didn't want anyone worrying about her. She hoped they could make it through the meal and everyone would hopefully leave.

After a few more minutes, Pauline was beginning to realize the pain was quite a bit stronger and it was constant. Luckily Russell was telling a story so the focus was off of her.

She had a white knuckle trip on the kitchen table. She felt as if she was in the clear for now and could manage to hold off for the rest of dinner.

Brian took notice that she was spaced out and grabbed her hand. Pauline didn't lightly grasp it or give it a gentle squeeze to signal she was alright, instead, she squeezed his hand with all she had and a moan escaped her lips, which wasn't intentional.

Russell stopped talking and all eyes were on her.

" MMMMMMMM." Pauline couldn't hold it in much longer.

Steph squeezed Johnny's hand under the table.

" Pauline; are you having the baby?" Steph asked.

" NO!" She shouted unintentionally realizing that all eyes were now on her. It was pretty obvious by her labored breathing something wasn't right.

Dawn could sense something was wrong by the death grip on poor Brian's hand. She pulled Stanley close.

" Is me mum having the baby?!" Stanley got excited.

Dawn nodded and hushed her brother, then looked over at her husband across the table.

" Russell, can you take Stanley to his room? Also bring some candles with you. You can play hide and go seek. It'll be fun, yeah?" She asked.

" Yeah!Let's go Russell!"

Before Stanley hurried up the stairs, he went over and kissed Pauline on the cheek and then continued on with Russell hot on his heels.

Johnny being a cop, and Steph being a mum herself had some experience on the matter at hand. Someone would be delivering a baby.

" I'm going to check and see if I have anything in my car. Mr. Spake can you get me some gloves?" Johnny asked.

Brian nodded. " Right away. Dawn- they are to the right of the stove." He replied, seemingly quite a bit calmer than his wife at the present moment.

" Brian! I can't-" Pant, blow, blow, " Do this!" Pauline began to cry.

" Yes you can, Pauline Spake. You can and you will. When it's all over, we'll go to the bloody hospital. Forget the bloody doctor's plan. It's all lies- babies have minds of their own and Victoria is already proving to have a mind of her own like her mum!" Brian remarked earning him a glare from Pauline.

She cried out in pain this time as it began to intensify and she felt her daughter shifting down. She was ready.

Dawn had grabbed a blanket and the baby's things from the nursery. Covering Pauline's lower half with the blanket, Steph managed to be a calming presence for the two.

Steph hurried to Brian and Pauline's side and rubbed her back and took her other hand as she talked Pauline through what was about to happen.

She was helping her breath properly as Brian held her hand, glad he had remained seated in the dining room chair. He was feeling very faint at the moment.

You would think for a man that worked his whole life in a butcher shop, that Brian's stomach would be well suited to remain calm in these situations but he couldn't.

He took a few deep breaths and kept his focus on helping Pauline to breath.

Johnny had thrown all his cares out the window as he stuck his hand around to check the progress of how far gone she was. Luckily he had his squad car and had radioed to the station they needed an ambulance to somehow make it through the snowstorm and he would deliver the baby with Steph's help.

Johnny's eyes went wide.

" The head...it's already out!" He said in shock as he looked up at Pauline, Steph, and Brian.

Dawn was keeping her distance pacing back and forth, twirling her hair as she peered over.

" I know that! I can feel it. AHH! Oh Brian, this is horrible! I can't do this!" Pauline screamed and cried into her husband. She felt like she was being ripped apart and was looking forward to the c-section her doctor wanted her to have.

She was beginning to get tired and not sure if she could keep this up.

Brian gently squeezed her shoulders as she continued to pant through the pains with Steph coaching her along.

" I KNOW HOW TO BREATHEEEE!" Pauline screamed loudly as she pushed once more.

Gathering the last bit of strength, she pushed like Steph told her too. Her ears were ringing but a weight was lifted as the pain ceased. Her breathing began to slow and she collapsed into Brain's chest. Pauline was sweaty and weak.

Dawn fainted. She had neared at the peak of Pauline's last contraction and had seen more than she bargained for at that moment in time.

" Oh my gosh." Johnny gasped as the baby wailed in his hands.

Tiny cries shook Pauline from her thoughts as Johnny lifted the tiny baby up for them to see. Brian's eyes welled with tears as he looked at the little thing. Pauline instinctively pulled her daughter close and draped the blanket over her little body.

Little Victoria felt her mother's heartbeat and curled up close and closed her eyes.

" She's here. Brian. She's here." Pauline sniffled.

" You did splendid. She's perfect." Brain whispered into her neck, kissing her sweaty, tear stained cheek.

Steph pulled away and allowed the little family a few moments as she tended to Dawn.

Johnny was in awe of the tiny little thing and was a bit floored himself at the task he'd just completed. It was also a bit surreal, seeing Brian and his mother like this, holding and doting over a tiny baby. His stomach dropped at the site. Lucky enough for him he saw flashing red lights outside and he sighed in relief, for something to take his mind off the pain presently in his heart.

" I'll get the door. See if you can get Dawn awake. Poor girl fainted." Steph chuckled as she put her hand on Johnny's shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.

He looked up at her a second. Their eyes met. A mutual understanding. No words needed. She knew what he was feeling and how hard this had been for him, but she hadn't been more proud of him than she was in that moment.

Nodding, he stood to move to see about Dawn and Steph went for the door, letting the medics in from outside.

" Never a dull moment in the Spake house, is there?" Brian asked. Pauline chuckled and snuggled into her husband's arms as she rocked Victoria very gently.

" Spake women enjoy being the center of attention." Pauline retorted with a wink up at Brian.

She placed a gentle kiss on Victoria's tiny head and shut her eyes to rest for a few moments, glad she was here and she was safe.

TBC...

Author's Note: Thank you so very much for all your reviews! here is the next installment! I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!


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